Restaurant Etiquette Guide 2026: Rules, Tips & What Not to Do

Making a Reservation

Book reservations on OpenTable, Resy, or by phone. For popular restaurants, book 2–4 weeks ahead for weekends, 1 week for weekdays. For special occasions (Valentine's Day, Mother's Day, New Year's Eve), book 6–8 weeks ahead.

When you book, note any dietary restrictions, allergies, or special occasions. This isn't requiring the restaurant to accommodate every request — it's giving them information to do their best.

Running Late? Call Ahead

If you'll be more than 10 minutes late for a reservation, call the restaurant. They'll usually hold your table. Showing up 25 minutes late without notice — especially at a small restaurant or on a busy night — can cascade into problems for the kitchen and other diners.

If your plans change and you can't make it, cancel your reservation with as much notice as possible. No-shows are one of the most damaging things for small restaurants — they turn away other guests for your table, then lose revenue when you don't show.

Dress Codes

Most casual and mid-range restaurants have no enforced dress code, but "smart casual" (no athletic wear or beachwear) is a reasonable baseline. Fine dining restaurants may require business casual or smart casual. Jackets required is rare now but still exists at a handful of legacy fine dining establishments.

When in doubt: overdressing is never a problem. Showing up underdressed at a fine dining restaurant creates an awkward situation.

How to Get Your Server's Attention

Make eye contact and raise your hand slightly — don't wave aggressively. If they're in conversation with another table, wait. A brief "excuse me" as they pass is appropriate. Never touch a server to get their attention. If you need something during a busy period, patience is part of the deal.

Dietary Restrictions & Modifications

Communicate allergies and dietary restrictions when you order — not at the end of the meal when the food arrives. If you have a serious allergy (anaphylactic), tell both your server and ask to confirm with the kitchen. This isn't extra; it's necessary.

Modifications are fine in moderation. Asking for dressing on the side or a burger without onions is normal. Asking for a dish to be completely rebuilt with 8 substitutions is something else — at that point, consider choosing a different dish.

Ordering Wine & Drinks

At a wine-focused restaurant, let the sommelier make a recommendation if you're unsure — give them your budget and flavor preferences, not a specific wine name unless you know what you want. It's not embarrassing to say "We'd like something around $60–80 that pairs well with the beef and the fish we're ordering."

If you have house wine, ordering the cheapest bottle on the list is completely acceptable. That bottle is there specifically because the restaurant stands behind it.

When to Send Food Back

Send food back if it arrived wrong, contains an allergen you flagged, is unsafe (undercooked protein, off smell), or is clearly wrong temperature (cold soup, lukewarm steak). Tell your server promptly and politely: "I think there may be a mistake — I ordered the salmon, not the halibut."

Do NOT send food back because you've changed your mind, don't like the flavor, or want to try something else. That's not what returning food is for.

Photography at Restaurants

A quick photo of your food is universally accepted now. What's not: standing up for photos, rearranging food extensively, photographing other diners without their consent, and making everyone wait for photographs before eating. Take your shot in under 30 seconds and put the phone away.

At intimate fine dining restaurants, ask before photographing — some chefs prefer their plating not appear on social media before the guest experience is complete.

Phone Calls at the Table

Don't take non-emergency calls at the table. If you must take a call, excuse yourself and step outside. Speaking on the phone at a table extends your conversation into other diners' spaces in a way that conversation between tablemates doesn't.

Splitting the Check

Ask the server before ordering if you'd like separate checks (not at the end). For group dinners, splitting evenly is usually simplest — obsessing over who ordered the $2 extra side dish creates unnecessary tension. If someone ordered dramatically more (bottle of wine, multiple expensive dishes), have them pay a larger share or cover it directly.

Use Venmo, Zelle, or Cash App to square up between yourselves if only one card goes to the server.

Tipping

The modern standard is 18–20% for good service at a sit-down restaurant. See our complete tipping guide for every scenario. Don't make a show of calculating the tip — it makes everyone at the table uncomfortable.

Lingering After the Meal

If the restaurant is full and people are waiting, be aware of how long you've been at your table after finishing your meal. A reasonable post-meal lingering time at a busy restaurant is 20–30 minutes for coffee or dessert. If you want to continue the conversation for hours, ordering more (dessert, drinks) or moving to a bar is considerate.

At an empty or slow restaurant, linger as long as you like — your presence isn't inconveniencing anyone.